Karl`s PC Help Forums

Prayer desired-to find stuff
scholar - 8-2-2008 at 04:38

<sad sigh> I've been missing the wallet with my driver's license in it for more than an week. The wallet also had some money in it. I'm also trying to find the license plate stickers which I was supposed to put on my license plate no later than Feb. 1, indicating my auto registration is paid up. I think I remember tossing the envelope somewhere (like on a desk or on a pile of stuff), and they slid off (perhaps onto the floor) somewhere. But, where? I am also missing a remote control to a DVD player, and a remote control to a TV. I've also been missing some sets of keys for several months. Prayers about any of these are desired.:)

On the good side, while looking, I found a pocket notebook that has been missing for perhaps 6 months, and it has some important information in it. I also found a bank envelope of money from when I cashed a paycheck, and forgot to put the money in my wallet.:banana):banana):banana):banana):banana):banana)


SRD - 8-2-2008 at 08:00

I used to live in chaos like that (another market story coming up).
We used to get hefty Christmas bonuses (several hundreds of pounds, and this was 30 years ago) which was paid, on Christmas Eve, part in cash and part in a cheque. It was a fairly liquid morning in the market and when I got back to the cottage I was renting I hunted around for a safe hiding place, not wanting to carry that amount of cash around the pubs I intended visiting that night. I put the cheque in my wallet. On the first banking day after Christmas I hunted high and low for that cash, but, almost entirely due to the quantities of alcohol imbibed over the Christmas period, I couldn't for the life of me remember where I had hidden it, so I was a little despondent only to pay the cheque into the bank.
18 months later I was moving, and a girlfriend was helping me pack everything up; "What's this?" she asks, holding up a Tibetan lamas hat (that's another story) "And what's this inside it?". There, neatly rolled up in the point of the hat was 500. Whoopee!!!


marymary100 - 8-2-2008 at 10:06

You've spoken about these things before scholar. Are they still lost or lost again?

I can't cope with living in chaos. The occasional "find" could not make up for the stress of losing things imo.


Quaver - 8-2-2008 at 10:08

SRD, are you saying Scholar needs a girlfriend:D

Scholar, I'll pray for you (in my own way, since I'm not religious);)


scholar - 8-2-2008 at 16:08

Quote:
Originally posted by marymary100
You've spoken about these things before scholar. Are they still lost or lost again?

I can't cope with living in chaos. The occasional "find" could not make up for the stress of losing things imo.
The license stickers are still lost. The wallet was lost again a little more than a week ago.

If SRD's story had anyone wondering, no, I don't drink or use drugs (other than medicines for their intended use).

It's not as if I have a choice of getting an operation that would remove my ADD and give me normal memory function and ability to stay on task. I don't want chaos, either, and these problems stress me greatly.:(:(:(


victor - 8-2-2008 at 16:27

Pin the Devil Scholar that will find them out. ;)


marymary100 - 8-2-2008 at 16:36

read # 14 onwards


scholar - 8-2-2008 at 17:52

Victor, are you joking?:P:P:P

Marymary, your link is quite helpful and encouraging. I am going to save its contents to a file in my computer.

Formerly, my main strategies were
1-taking effective medicine
2-using my professional activities for the main structure in my life
3-depending on my wife to help me with my deficiencies

My doctor changed my medicine (against my wishes), I don't have a full-time position, and my wife left me for another man, so my main strategies have been disrupted.

And now, it's time to work on finding those key missing items (at least the wallet and the stickers, I hope), after which I hope to run some errands.waveysmiley


scholar - 8-2-2008 at 17:54

Quote:
Originally posted by Quaver
SRD, are you saying Scholar needs a girlfriend:D
I do need a girlfriend. Or, at least I would like one. :D

In any case, I'm glad to have friends here, girls and guys. ;)


SRD - 8-2-2008 at 19:01

Quote:
Originally posted by Quaver
SRD, are you saying Scholar needs a girlfriend:D

Scholar, I'll pray for you (in my own way, since I'm not religious);)
No, the only reason to have a partner is because you both want it that way. We are all responsible for ourselves and have to maintain stratagems to support ourselves, obviously for some this is easier than others, I started by having a box for each month and chucked everything into this month's box, it made finding things easier but meant I had a lot of boxes (I still do :D )


victor - 8-2-2008 at 19:07

Quote:
Originally posted by marymary100
read # 14 onwards


* lists
* colour-coding
* reminders
* notes to self
* rituals
* files
They are all right as long as you remember what they signified or are in the first place. ;)


Quaver - 8-2-2008 at 19:47

Quote:
Originally posted by SRD
I started by having a box for each month and chucked everything into this month's box, it made finding things easier but meant I had a lot of boxes (I still do :D )

12 boxed/year, after 20 years 240 boxes!shocked_yellow

I have box files, divided into Car, Visa card, electricity, gas, mobile phone etc. There's an empty one called 'utility' for some reasonconfused2


scholar - 8-2-2008 at 20:07

I have many boxes in my living room, into which I have put stuff that was overflowing from desks and shelves. They could all be considered "Miscellaneous." :(


SRD - 8-2-2008 at 20:13

Quote:
Originally posted by Quaver
Quote:
Originally posted by SRD
I started by having a box for each month and chucked everything into this month's box, it made finding things easier but meant I had a lot of boxes (I still do :D )

12 boxed/year, after 20 years 240 boxes!shocked_yellow

I have box files, divided into Car, Visa card, electricity, gas, mobile phone etc. There's an empty one called 'utility' for some reasonconfused2
I've learnt to chuck them out after 10 years. More seriously, I go through them each year, chuck out what I don't need which normally reduces it down to 1 box.
I also have taught myself not to save things 'just in case' if it has no use this week, it goes out.


marymary100 - 8-2-2008 at 20:16

Quote:
Originally posted by scholar
I have many boxes in my living room, into which I have put stuff that was overflowing from desks and shelves. They could all be considered "Miscellaneous." :(



Which is rather a big clue about why things go missing......labels are the way forward. You have time just now to sort this out. An hour or so of chaos in exchange for a few months of structure.


Quaver - 8-2-2008 at 20:16

Quote:
Originally posted by scholar
They could all be considered "Miscellaneous." :(

You need to label them;)

Edit:I posted at the same time as Mary:D


Quaver - 8-2-2008 at 20:18

Quote:
Originally posted by SRD
I also have taught myself not to save things 'just in case' if it has no use this week, it goes out.

That's a good idea, hard, but goodkewl_glasses


LSemmens - 9-2-2008 at 11:10

Everything has a home. If I'm looking for unpaid bills they're in the "inbox", recently paid ones in the "to be filed box", the rest are in the filing cabinet. My keys reside on a hook inside the door. The wallet either by the keys or on my desk. Even my tools reside in their "homes" except when I'm using them, then they are close at hand. No! my place isn't "sterile and drab" I do manage to "lose things". I've discovered today that I've managed to lose a lens out of my reading glasses. The problem is, I was wearing them at the time (they live on a cord around my neck). Today I managed to get back to working on lining the shed, so the lens could be anywhere on the ground (we live on a 1/2 Acre block, and I've been all over it)


janet - 9-2-2008 at 19:41

Quote:
Originally posted by marymary100
Quote:
Originally posted by scholar
I have many boxes in my living room, into which I have put stuff that was overflowing from desks and shelves. They could all be considered "Miscellaneous." :(



Which is rather a big clue about why things go missing......labels are the way forward. You have time just now to sort this out. An hour or so of chaos in exchange for a few months of structure.


Labels and routine.

Don't put things down unless they are in the right place.

Don't allow yourself to be distracted.

This is going to sound harsh, but this is a condition you have and have to live with and you've got to find routines and strategies that work for you all the time.

To be honest, most of us deal with handicaps of one form or another and have to sort out how to deal with them.


scholar - 9-2-2008 at 22:07

Quote:
Originally posted by janet
Labels and routine.

Don't put things down unless they are in the right place.

Don't allow yourself to be distracted.

This is going to sound harsh, but this is a condition you have and have to live with and you've got to find routines and strategies that work for you all the time.

To be honest, most of us deal with handicaps of one form or another and have to sort out how to deal with them.

I appreciate your well-wishes and good intentions for me.;)

The nature of the disorder is such that it does not always conform to what one might imagine would work.

For example, "Don't allow yourself to be distracted" is like saying to a blind man, "Watch where you're going." One defining characteristic of Attention Deficit Disorder is that one will be easily distracted.

That is one thing I found truly wonderful about the article to which Marymary linked, it sounds as if it were written from the personal experience of people with ADD (e.g. "18. Acknowledge and anticipate the inevitable collapse of X% of projects undertaken" No matter how hard I try, I can't set aside my ADD symptoms. But, like the salesman who has to knock on more doors because he is not quite so good as the other salesman, I can still do OK.

The reference to "Labels and routine" speaks to many of my problems. I don't have as much routiine as I would like, and many of my misadventures are when my routine is broken. I routinely put my wallet at location A, and will find it there 95% of the time. But, when I change clothes in the middle of the day, I am doing something unusual, and I am not in the same room as location A, and I am not following my routine behavior--and I don't remember where I put the wallet.

"Don't put things down unless they are in the right place." If I would manage to do that, it would be a great help. Sometimes I go to a lot of trouble to follow that--I notice a tool out of place, and I run it upstairs to its box, or I see a book and move it to its shelf. I may do this well enough to get an "A" on my usual grading scale, but it is awfully hard to do it 100% of the time.:)


marymary100 - 9-2-2008 at 22:23

Have you labelled your files yet?


jennywren - 9-2-2008 at 22:29

Scholar,I have a 14year old nephew who is very badly affected by ADHD.Life is a constant struggle for my sister who is wonderful at coping with his disability.I know how difficult life can be with this disorder.My advice would be keep taking small steps and be kind to yourself.You are doing OK.


scholar - 9-2-2008 at 22:49

Thank you, Jenny. You're sweet, and kind. :)

Quote:
Originally posted by marymary100
Have you labelled your files yet?
No, I thought I would do better to make finding the wallet and stickers a higher priority.

It's hard for me to even estimate how long it might take me to sort things into files--forty hours, perhaps? Among the papers, bills, records, mail, cards, and receipts are physical items as well, many for which I have no specific place. They are in many boxes, shelves, drawers, and surfaces, in many rooms, on more than one floor of the house. :(

I want to find the license sticker because a policeman might notice mine is expired and stop me. I would be liable for one expensive icket for that. Then, since I don't have my wallet yet, I would be ticketed with another fine for not having my driver's license with me.

I'd best get off the computer and resume the search.


marymary100 - 9-2-2008 at 22:53

Turn one room into the filing room perhaps? A room with lots of shelves/boxes all labelled? This will be your life forever if you don't at least attempt to get it in order.



Your choice of course.


janet - 9-2-2008 at 23:05

Quote:
Originally posted by scholar
Quote:
Originally posted by janet
Labels and routine.

Don't put things down unless they are in the right place.

Don't allow yourself to be distracted.

This is going to sound harsh, but this is a condition you have and have to live with and you've got to find routines and strategies that work for you all the time.

To be honest, most of us deal with handicaps of one form or another and have to sort out how to deal with them.

I appreciate your well-wishes and good intentions for me.;)

The nature of the disorder is such that it does not always conform to what one might imagine would work.

For example, "Don't allow yourself to be distracted" is like saying to a blind man, "Watch where you're going." One defining characteristic of Attention Deficit Disorder is that one will be easily distracted.


I'm well aware of that. That does not mean, however, that one can not work toward NOT becoming distracted.

The parallel you offer is not apt. A blind person *can not see*. Someone with ADD *may* become distracted but they do retain the ability not to become so - it is not *impossible* for them, as it is for a blind person to see.

Quote:


That is one thing I found truly wonderful about the article to which Marymary linked, it sounds as if it were written from the personal experience of people with ADD (e.g. "18. Acknowledge and anticipate the inevitable collapse of X% of projects undertaken" No matter how hard I try, I can't set aside my ADD symptoms. But, like the salesman who has to knock on more doors because he is not quite so good as the other salesman, I can still do OK.


No one has asked you to set aside the symptoms you have to deal with - no one would do so. I can't set aside the disability with which I deal, nor can others do the same for the issues they deal with.
Quote:


The reference to "Labels and routine" speaks to many of my problems. I don't have as much routiine as I would like, and many of my misadventures are when my routine is broken. I routinely put my wallet at location A, and will find it there 95% of the time. But, when I change clothes in the middle of the day, I am doing something unusual, and I am not in the same room as location A, and I am not following my routine behavior--and I don't remember where I put the wallet.


The answer is there - "when I am not following my routine". There will be times this is a necessity - and there need to be ways of dealing with that.
Quote:


"Don't put things down unless they are in the right place." If I would manage to do that, it would be a great help. Sometimes I go to a lot of trouble to follow that--I notice a tool out of place, and I run it upstairs to its box, or I see a book and move it to its shelf. I may do this well enough to get an "A" on my usual grading scale, but it is awfully hard to do it 100% of the time.:)


No one is asking you to do it 100% of the time.

We're suggesting ways in which you can minimise the issues you have to deal with.


LSemmens - 10-2-2008 at 10:56

A suggestion on the wallet front, scholar. Go back and check the pockets on all your trousers, and, for that fact, jackets, too.


scholar - 11-2-2008 at 13:23

I remember the last pants I was wearing when I had the wallet (a grey pair that I wear around the house, because it has a little rust mark on the back pocket area). I took the wallet out and threw the pants into the dirty clothes basket--but I don't remember where I set the wallet.

I'll keep looking. :)


SRD - 11-2-2008 at 13:49

scholar, you need my stepfather; when I was about 8 years old I was given a 10/- note for my 2/6d dinner money with strong admonishments to bring the change home as we were pretty poor at the time. I got home, no change! My stepfather made me go through my day, moment by moment, until I remembered that, during playtime, I had been upended on the playing field. He marched me up to the school field and made me show him whereabouts we had been playing, he then explained that he would stick his umbella into the ground, describe a 2 yard circle around it, and we would search that area, moving on after we were sure that that part of the field did not contain the 7/6d. So he stuck his umbrella into the ground, took two paces, bent down and picked up the money. I wasn't sure whether to admire or hate him. :D
However, going very carefully through my movements when I have lost something is a tactic I use regularly to find things I have mislaid.


Quaver - 11-2-2008 at 14:02

Quote:
Originally posted by SRD
I wasn't sure whether to admire or hate him. :D

Admire himkewl_glasses
Quote:
However, going very carefully through my movements when I have lost something is a tactic I use regularly to find things I have mislaid.

So do I. It works most of the time;)


marymary100 - 11-2-2008 at 14:15

I lost my keys the other day. They weren't where I put them and I had to resort to the spare key to get back in my house.

They had, in fact, fallen into the ripped lining in my rather large handbag and were lying there covered by material.

Once you've checked the obvious, check again especially if there's a lining...........;)


Quaver - 11-2-2008 at 15:16

Quote:
Originally posted by marymary100
Once you've checked the obvious, check again especially if there's a lining...........;)

I've lost my watch once, I put it in my pocket, but the pocket had a hole, and it slipped out:(
It was at a church (cathedral), so I left my details incase it was found. It was found, and was sent to our college, and was pinned up on the noticeboard:o


scholar - 11-2-2008 at 16:11

A couple of weeks have passed since I lost it. I expect that will make it harder for me to remember than if I had tried the very next day. :(


LSemmens - 12-2-2008 at 10:35

You didn't happen to hang those trousers on summat before you washed them? My wallet was missing for some time, to the point that I was about to cancel all my cards and start again, when I luckily found it on the floor against the wall behind the coat rack where we hang clothes we intend to wear again. It may also be in the pocket of the trousers that you changed into.


scholar - 12-2-2008 at 13:12

Hallelujah! I found the wallet! dancingbanana_new.gifdancingbanana_new.gifdancingbanana_new.gifdancingbanana_new.gifdancingbanana_new.gifdancingbanana_new.gifdancingbanana_new.gif
It appears to have slid off a chair that had some other stuff on it, as well.

It still has everything in it (driver's license, money, Kroger discount card).

I thank all who joined me in prayer.waveysmiley


Quaver - 12-2-2008 at 14:29

Congratulations! Have you found the licence plate sticker yet?


scholar - 12-2-2008 at 23:16

No, O Quaver, I have not.

I have many pairs of pants and suitcoats laying around, which I have picked up at thrift stores (my waste size has grown some, and my older clothes no longer fit). I bought some materials to hang a clothing rod in my basement, and some jumbo clothes hangers (thick enough to hang slacks, without the dreaded horizontal crease at the knees:o). This will help a lot in reducing clutter. I have been throwing away stuff I don't need (mostly papers), and disposed of two garbage bags today.

After I finish the clothes rod and the clothes, I'll see what I can see. I hope I'll find it tonight. Even if I don't find it right away, my environment will be greatly improved. I have already discovered that I have several pairs of pants which fit me, that I haven't worn yet. (The big price tags are still on them!) greengrin.


LSemmens - 13-2-2008 at 14:13

Good news Scholar, keep going with the cleanup, you might find more stuff that you'd forgotten that you'd lost.